yeahwriters
For a few months when I was eighteen I was having sex with someone who had faded scars all up and down his arms, small short scars from a knife, maybe a razor blade. I would look at them when he wore t-shirts and I would look at them when we were naked and I wanted to run my fingers along every single one. I touched them a few times, but always lightly, like I didn’t mean it. I don’t know, I thought I’d embarrass him. For a few months when I was nineteen I was having sex with someone with little stretch marks all over his shoulders and chest and stomach and I wanted to stare at them but I tried not to; I wanted to touch them but I was scared to make him feel strange in his body. Later that same year I had sex just once with someone who I met on the bus back home from school, who had straight blond hair and tattoos on his calves and no scars at all on his body. He bought me some beers at the bar out past the mall, then brought me back to his place where he put his hand around my throat and laughed and laughed. I stayed the night anyway, then left his house early in the morning and walked all the way home down Loudon Road and over the river, wondering how close I’d just come to dying, making a list in my head of what the pros and cons would’ve been.

Ungrateful Skin by Claire Comstock-Gay | Two Serious Ladies

A very important melty, hurty, yearnful story by our own Claire Comstock-Gay, who you may better know as Madame Clairevoyant. This is her first published piece of fiction!

(via therumpus)

This is sooooo gooooood I’m so glad I read it. 

(via yeahwriters)
portraitsofboston
portraitsofboston:

     “I see so many motivated people in life, but I feel stuck in my day-to-day routine. I’m trying to break out of that—I want to do things, but I can’t find the inspiration. All my friends have gigs, and are going to New York and getting really famous, but I’m stuck here. I don’t want to be like this. I’m always thinking about how much time I have, and how I’m not doing anything with that time. My mom says, ‘The more time you have, the less you do.’ It seems true. It feels like yesterday I was a freshman in college. I don’t know where the time went.” 

portraitsofboston:

     “I see so many motivated people in life, but I feel stuck in my day-to-day routine. I’m trying to break out of that—I want to do things, but I can’t find the inspiration. All my friends have gigs, and are going to New York and getting really famous, but I’m stuck here. I don’t want to be like this. I’m always thinking about how much time I have, and how I’m not doing anything with that time. My mom says, ‘The more time you have, the less you do.’ It seems true. It feels like yesterday I was a freshman in college. I don’t know where the time went.” 

yeahwriters
Although many writers had had periods of significant depression, mania, or hypomania, they were consistently appealing, entertaining, and interesting people. They had led interesting lives, and they enjoyed telling me about them as much as I enjoyed hearing about them. Mood disorders tend to be episodic, characterized by relatively brief periods of low or high mood lasting weeks to months, interspersed with long periods of normal mood (known as euthymia to us psychiatrists). All the writers were euthymic at the time that I interviewed them, and so they could look back on their periods of depression or mania with considerable detachment. They were also able to describe how abnormalities in mood state affected their creativity. Consistently, they indicated that they were unable to be creative when either depressed or manic.

The relationship between creativity and mental illness – a fascinating study based on writers from the prestigious Iowa Writers’ Workshop. Kurt Vonnegut was among the subjects. (via explore-blog)

I think about this a lot, as I suffer from panic disorder.

(via yeahwriters)